HBO is Pumping True Blood to Your Ears

It seems that HBO’s vampire hit True Blood isn’t just about what goes in the mouth; it also matters what goes in your ears. Word has reached our lobes that the premium cable channel has signed a deal to market some pretty fancy earmuffs based on the show.

In case you’re wondering, we’re talking ultra-cool headphones here, not those daft-looking fluffy balls that make you look like a half-developed were-rabbit. HBO has announced a partnership with V-Moda to make and market a collection of “hearwear” that, official word says, “naturally aligns with True Blood’s sexy night life.” Hmm, that sounds yummy. V-Moda is said to be a “true music lifestyle brand that is distinguished by its fashion-forward design, unparalleled quality and unequivocal passion for music and materials.” Sink your teeth into that.

“Music is a very integral part of the story telling for all of our programming, especially True Blood,” said James Costos, vice president Licensing & Retailing, HBO.  “So it made sense for us to partner with V-MODA which is an extremely forward-thinking music accessories company.  In addition, their brand mirrors the edgy, provocative qualities that are so closely associated with the show.”

We’re not sure how you make headphones edgy and provocative but it’s got our imaginations racing. (Egg plant, anyone?). Anyway, they’d better look good because they’re apparently built to last. The True Blood,…er, line will have “immortal durability” thanks to its “timeless materials”: metal plates, Kevlar-reinforced cables and luxurious fabrics. And it will have undergone “military-tough” testing (we can just see the troops sporting these in Afghanistan to put them through their paces). And if that marketing doesn’t bring you back from the dead, consider that the sound they pump out is said to be ‘souuuuupernatural’ [sic; cue scary organ music].

But getting back to the serious stuff…

“The fantastical world of True Blood speaks to the vision and values of the V-MODA Tribe,” Kolton said. “Our products have been carefully crafted for those whose style and sophistication have evolved through the ages.  With each season, more and more people have found it impossible to resist the allure of True Blood and we think the same will be true of the new “V-MODA for True Blood” line. Like the show, it’s boldly seductive.”

Customers whose “style and sophistication have evolved through the ages,” eh? Clearly we’re not talking Walking Dead-style undead here.

Of course, even immortal products aren’t released at random. HBO’s announcement coincides with the release this week of Season Three of True Blood on DVD and Blu-ray and the premiere of Season Four. That’s coming up on HBO on June 26 at 9pm. You can watch a preview below.